FAQs

Frequently Asked Questions

Do I need to see a counsellor?
Life may run smoothly and sometimes it may be difficult. When difficulties arise and we
can’t sort them out alone, with family or friends, then counselling may help.

How does counselling help?
Counselling offers you a different relationship from any other, one which is designed to help you sort through your problems and, through this relationship, to find solutions for yourself.

How do I know if counselling will be right for me?
I offer a free initial session for you to meet me and talk about counselling, and to have a counselling session without charge. This is so that you can have a brief experience of how counselling will be before you make any commitment to the process, to yourself or to me. This will give you an opportunity to decide whether you want to try counselling or not. You can stop the counselling at any time if you decide later that it is not helpful to you.

How do I know if you will be the right counsellor for me?
During the initial free session we will have a chance to meet and you will have a chance to decide whether you want to work with me or not. I will try to help you find a different counsellor with a different approach should you want this.

Are you qualified? Accredited? What does accreditation mean?

1. I hold a BA(Hons) degree in counselling granted by Middlesex University and Metanoia Institute.
2. I also hold a Diploma in person-centred counselling granted by Metanoia Institute.
3. I am an accredited member of BACP (British association for Counselling and Psychotherapy) one of the leading associations for counselling in the United Kingdom.
4. I am a registered independent counsellor.
5. I hold a certificate in supervision granted by the Centre for Supervision and Team Development (CSTD)
6. I have trained in the use of EMDR with trainers from the EMDR Institute.  

Accreditation means that my work and training have met a standard that has been set by the BACP. I apply each year for continued accreditation, by demonstrating to the BACP that I continue to meet their standard in my work and on-going training. For more information about BACP and their accreditation, please visit www.bacp.co.uk.

What theoretical model of counselling do you use? And what does this mean for me?
I am a person-centred counsellor. Carl Rogers developed this approach between the 1940’s and 1980’s, as he found new ways to work with people in distress. Please visit my page, ‘My Philosophy’ to learn more about the approach and my way of working within it.

I also use EMDR when working with certain issues such as trauma. Francine Shapiro who discovered the process found that this way of working helped clients to process their traumatic and/or stuck memories. Please visit my EMDR page to learn more about this.

Is it a sign of weakness to see a counsellor?
Seeing a counsellor is a courageous thing to do, it is not a sign of weakness. I believe that there are situations in life which you may find easier to sort out by talking with a stranger, someone who is trained in ways to help facilitate your discovery of answers to your problems.

Do you think I am crazy or mad?
No, I do not think you are crazy or mad if you come to see me or because you have a problem you are unable to sort out on your own. I offer a non-judgemental space for you to talk about things that trouble you.

How can I talk to you, my problem is so awful?
I do not judge people by their actions or their circumstances. I support the human-ness in all of us and believe that we are all trying to do the best we can. I know it will take time for you to build up trust in me, and I understand that you may not want to tell me everything that brings you to me until you feel this trust so that I can help you with all your problems.

Who else will know? Is counselling confidential?
Confidentiality is an extremely important part of the counselling arrangement, and I take it very seriously. However, there are a few aspects of confidentiality that I think need to be explained.

• Counsellors are required to work with a supervisor to improve their practise (please go to www.bacp.co.uk to learn more about counselling and the ethical framework I work by). When I see my supervisor, it is sometimes necessary to tell him small parts of your story in order to help me work better with you. I do not tell my supervisor any more than I need to and he does not know the identity of any of my clients.
• One time I might break confidentiality with you would be if I thought you were in real danger of causing harm to yourself or to another; I would only do this after discussion with you about your options; I would always prefer for you to seek further help yourself, and would only break confidentiality myself in an extreme case.
• In the unusual event that the police might want to interview me regarding a case they are working on, I would try to maintain confidentiality as best I could, again I would discuss this both with you and my supervisor as soon as I could. In law there is only one protected profession which is the legal profession, everyone else is required to testify in court if asked, and should I refuse, I would be in contempt of court. This is a serious situation, and again one I would discuss with you and my supervisor, if this were possible.
• In the event of my death or incapacity, my professional executor would be informed of my clients contact details, so that he could contact you to inform you of my situation and help you to find a new counsellor if you wanted one. He would also have access to and would destroy any client notes I had at the time, without reading them.
• I will discuss all the aspects of confidentiality more with you if you would like.

What is a professional executor?
He is a member of the counselling profession who has agreed to take care of my practice and my clients if I should die or become incapacitated whilst I am still working as a counsellor. He will be notified of my situation by my solicitor and will act according to the terms of my will and my instructions to him.

Do you take notes, make tapes or videos?
I do not take notes during counselling sessions, but I do make brief notes afterwards as a memory aid and, sometimes, for later reflection. These notes are kept in a locked chest in my counselling room. Should I die or become incapacitated, my professional executor has agreed to destroy them for me, without reading them. I do not tape, or make videos.

What happens in the first session?
During the first session, we will discuss the practicalities of our counselling relationship should we decide to embark upon it. We may talk about counselling in general and what it might be able to do for you. You may wish to tell me what has brought you to me, and have a counselling session, or you may prefer to wait until the next meeting before you start to tell me your problems. You may not want to decide straight away whether or not you want to continue with me, and in this case you can always call me later if you want to come back to see me. This meeting is without charge, so there is no financial or personal commitment until you are ready to make one with the knowledge you need for this decision. If I become aware that I would not be the best person for you to work with, I would discuss this with you and offer to refer you to someone more suitable for your needs.

How long do I need to see a counsellor and how often?
I offer open-ended counselling. I believe that you will know when you want to end your counselling relationship with me and trust you to tell me. Most of my clients see me once a week for 1 hour, we will discuss this in the first session and I can make different arrangements if you would like to do so. Counselling may last only one session, some months or possibly years.

How does counselling come to an end?
When you are ready to end the counselling relationship I trust you to tell me. It may be that you know your situation is coming to an end and are aware that you will want to stop working with me at that time, or it may be that you have done enough work. We will then decide whether you want to come for one or more sessions to end the relationship, or whether you would prefer to end it immediately. It may be useful to have a review of the sessions for you to go away with a clear insight into what you have achieved.

What would happen if you were no longer able to work with me, but I am not ready to end the relationship?
If I die or become incapacitated, then my professional executor will phone you and explain the circumstances to you. He will then help you to find a new counsellor if that is what you would like. If I decide to stop working as a counsellor before you are ready to stop working with me, I would tell you about it as soon as I could and discuss your feelings about it as well as your options. If or when you wanted me to, I would help you find a new counsellor.

Can I become dependant on counselling?
Yes, this can happen. Counselling is the process of helping you to find the best way to live your life, and therefore your dependence on your counsellor is the opposite of what I work for. However I do think there are times when you might become dependant on me to help you to find your way through a difficult situation or time in your life. I am very aware that too much dependence on me would be a mis-use of my position and I would work hard to prevent that situation. If I thought that you were dependant on me I would discuss it with you and also with my supervisor to find ways to reduce your dependency as soon as possible.

Is my problem important enough for counselling? Or am I wasting your time?
It is hard to visit a counsellor; I believe that if you find something difficult enough to bring to me then it is important enough to talk about, and not a waste of my time.

Why do I feel nervous?
It takes courage for many people to talk about their problems. Sometimes the problems are wrapped up in shame, fear, anger or embarrassment. For some people, just meeting a new person is difficult, and for others doing something new is very daunting. These are some reasons why you might be feeling nervous, and there may be a different reason. I would be happy to talk about this with you during the first session.

What is the difference between counselling and psychotherapy?
This question is still being debated by counsellors and psychotherapists. I call myself a counsellor because my training was defined in this way. I do not think that the work I do is limited to certain issues, such as relationships, because I am a counsellor, nor do I think that my work is necessarily less deep than psychotherapy. I have worked with many different issues, and I have worked very deeply with my clients. I understand that psychotherapists do have a higher degree than I have, and they have worked, at least for a short time, in a mental health institution, which I have not. I do not think there is any difference between the ways that we work in the two professions.

What is the person-centred approach to counselling?
This approach was developed by Carl Rogers between the 1940’s and 1980’s, as he found new ways to work with people in distress. Please visit my page ‘My Philosophy’ for information about the approach and how I work within it.

What is EMDR?
EMDR was discovered and developed by Francine Shapiro in the 1980’s. It is a specific technique which causes the brain to begin processing material that has become stuck as though in our present, and moving these memories to long-term memory storage. The immediacy of the emotions attached to the memory goes away. Please visit my EMDR page for more about this process.

I need a referral from my GP?
No, although a GP may have suggested that you see a counsellor.

Can I bring my children, partner or a friend?
The relationship between us, as client and counsellor, will be unlike any other. It will not be enhanced by the presence of another person, and it may be impossible to create. You may want to have a friend or family member bring you to your sessions and collect you afterwards but I don’t have a waiting room for them to wait in; they are welcome to wait in a car in the driveway, or there are a few coffee shops a short distance away. Please ask me about this when you call me. If you are looking for couple or family counselling I will be happy to refer you to another counsellor who works in this way.

How much does counselling cost?
My fee is £40 for a 60-minute session. However I know that some people, for many reasons, are unable to pay this amount. During the initial session I will discuss my fee with you and we will decide what it will be, should you decide to work with me, according to your ability to pay.

Do you have evening or weekend appointments?
I work from Monday to Wednesday and my last appointment is at 7.30pm.

What happens if I can’t attend an appointment I have booked?
I do not charge for missed sessions and I always appreciate a phone call or email to let me know if you are unable to attend a session we have arranged. If I do not hear from you I will phone you to find out if you want to make another appointment unless you have asked me not to do so.

Do you have a car park?
There is space in the driveway for you to leave your car.

Are you near to public transport?
Yes. The West Byfleet train station is a short walk away, and the town is served by several different bus routes all with stops fairly close by. Please visit www.nationalrail.co.uk and www.surreybybus.pindar.com for more information about timetables and routes.

Do you have facilities for disabled people?
There are two small steps into my counselling rooms. Please tell me if you have specific needs and I will tell you if I am able to work with them.

What is the BACP?
The British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy is one of the leading British associations in the field of ‘talking therapies’. It is concerned with the professions of counselling and psychotherapy, the training of professionals, their ethical and best practise, their development and, when necessary, offers a complaints procedure. For more information please visit www.bacp.co.uk.

What is the UKRC?
The United Kingdom Register of Counsellors is an unbiased register of accredited counsellors who belong to the different associations in the United Kingdom. For information about the UKRC and UKRC registered counsellors, please visit www.ukrconline.org.uk.

What is BAPCA?
The British Association for the Person-Centred Approach promotes person-centred psychology and the person-centred approach in Britain. For more information, please visit www.bapca.org.